Friday, March 13, 2009

Potty Training....Can You Feel It?

I lift him up to set him on the training seat and he swings his foot up, before I can react, he puts it down inside, toes splashing the water. I pull him up and the seat goes flying as he kicks it with his wet foot. Hanging on to him with one hand, I readjust the training seat on the toilet. Despite his protest, I know he needs to go; a sippy cup full of juice will not stay in a two year old body for longer than 30 least not my two year old. I finally get the correct body part on the seat and squat down in front of him as he is squirms to get away.

"Candy?" I ask, desperately bribing.

"No, candy!"


His body relaxes as he softly repeats the word. That's my boy. Two seconds later we celebrate the sweet sound of tinkle in the potty.

Don't get me wrong, I am a pretty laid back kind of mama, but after two weeks of dripping underpants and suspicious puddles, I wasn't about to let all our hard work not get flushed down the toilet.

That's what it is, hard work.

Work that is worth every minute when I can cross diapers off my grocery list for good, not to mention changing and disposing of the stinky ones. To be completely honest, what I have really enjoyed is the work itself; working with my boy for the independence that we both want. Each conversation, and cleanup, each accident and celebration; each moment is ours.

That, I love.

Nothing is one sided. Weaved in with the satisfaction of learning together, is the lamenting of the loss of my little one. Oh, I know there is a lot of sweet cuddly left, but this morning as I rocked him in the early darkness, feeling his weight against my chest, I leaned in, smelling his sweet breath. I closed my eyes and let it all settle in......deep down, tucking it away with tiny toes, early morning feedings, fingers grasped around my own, and newness that will never get old.

Not wishing it away, and not wishing it back....just content and grateful for every moment and all the blessings it brings.

We feel, and so we are....who were you this week?


  1. "Not wishing it away, and not wishing it back....just content and grateful for every moment and all the blessings it brings."

    So beautifully written!

  2. Es--I love everything you come up with to blog about--and you word it well.


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